My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
