you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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