Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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