I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
