Nicole vs. Life
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I'm getting married
To pizza
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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