for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
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