i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
