didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
okay pat passed out under dana's car
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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