I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
50% drunk capacity currently
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
