did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
