I smell stomach acid.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
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I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Who put my cat in the fridge?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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