Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I have fence marks all over my body
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Pants are for mortals
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
