That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize
