I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize