I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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