yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Randomize
