god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
