I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
My liver just had a heart attack.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
