who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
