ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize