Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
