Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize