ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Randomize
