i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize