So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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