I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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