There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
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