NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize