he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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