Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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