I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
