Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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