I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
