new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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