Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
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I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
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Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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