I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
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