I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
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Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
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I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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