oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
