Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
where are my eyebrows?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize