I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
