Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize