carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
operation harelip BJ is a go
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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