her vagine was all disorganized.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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