Texts From Last Night

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  (214): View more from Texas

  I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.

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  (214): I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day. http://tfl.nu/pcf7
  Replies (26) Good night (5281) Bad night (546)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..

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  (631): My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms.. http://tfl.nu/s1m5
  Replies (15) Good night (4605) Bad night (726)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..

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  (425): there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room.. http://tfl.nu/dpny
  Replies (17) Good night (5759) Bad night (1062)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache

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  (315): at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache http://tfl.nu/jjc2
  Replies (14) Good night (1182) Bad night (4048)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  There r osticjed everywhere

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  (248): There r osticjed everywhere http://tfl.nu/gpnb
  Replies (12) Good night (1801) Bad night (1107)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?

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  (218): Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday? http://tfl.nu/s08h
  Replies (5) Good night (2075) Bad night (867)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.

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  (240): she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes. http://tfl.nu/9p5u
  Replies (10) Good night (1321) Bad night (842)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.

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  (302): I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this. http://tfl.nu/2m37
  Replies (9) Good night (1710) Bad night (615)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.

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  (507): I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins. http://tfl.nu/raw5
  Replies (7) Good night (762) Bad night (1034)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her

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  (315): She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her http://tfl.nu/g7bc
  Replies (1) Good night (660) Bad night (333)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.

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  (262): In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise. http://tfl.nu/9a8z
  Replies (5) Good night (446) Bad night (448)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.

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  (317): Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life. http://tfl.nu/xt94
  Replies (1) Good night (741) Bad night (203)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?

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  (304): We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is? http://tfl.nu/tyju
  Replies (1) Good night (485) Bad night (229)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life

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  (250): so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life http://tfl.nu/wis1
  Replies (6) Good night (267) Bad night (1028)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous

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  (248): Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous http://tfl.nu/u4ke
  Replies (2) Good night (531) Bad night (272)

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