Swine flu is the new snow day.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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