idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
