I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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