why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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