There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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