i just had sex bonerless
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
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