oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
