Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
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Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
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moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap